From: ephemeral@ephemeralfic.org Date: 17 Nov 2004 19:05:38 -0000 Subject: NEW - "Nexus" by xphilernj by xphilernj Source: direct Reply To: xphilernj@aol.com Title: Nexus Author: xphilernj E-mail: xphilernj@aol.com Date: February 20, 2004 Rating: PG Category: Post-Ep Keywords: MSR, V, with a little bit of angst. Spoilers: Paper Hearts Summary: One last heart unaccounted for. One last ache to be locked away. One last heart left to be pondered, worried over and then labeled 'unsolved,' but not forgotten. Mulder would never forget. Author Notes: Thank you Fibbie for your beta help and loving friendship. And hugs and kisses to SweetSallie for her beta help and her never-ending encouragement. If not for these two wonderful ladies I would not have a story worth reading. Much love to you both. Disclaimer: Character property of CC and Company, 1013 Productions and Fox. Darn. * * * * * Nexus by xphilernj * * * * * Follow. El Camino. Mad Hat. Woods. Fear. Running. Heart. Sinking. Disappears. Screams. Scully! Mulder sat up quickly, and rubbed his face with his tee shirt, which was now drenched in sweat. His eyes darted around the room tracking slivers of light from one corner to the next. He caught sight of the shimmering red light of the VCR. 10:13 P.M. He stood, pacing back and forth until his frantic footsteps took him to the blind-covered window. Anxiety engulfed and threatened to suffocate him, trapping him in a haze that squeezed and choked. Mulder raised the blinds, and opened the window, letting the cool night air wash over him. He inhaled, his chest tightened, and he was unable to do more than take in short gulps of air. He rubbed his face with trembling hands as his heart pounded a primal rhythm in his ears. Why now? The case was closed, wasn't it? John Lee Roche was dead, wasn't he? It had been so long ago, and nothing fruitful could be gleaned from the limited information that had been left in Roche's wake. One last heart unaccounted for. One last ache to be locked away. One last heart left to be pondered, worried over and then labeled 'unsolved,' but not forgotten. Mulder would never forget. Guilt riddled his mind, shook him to the core. Another little girl had been taken because of his inane need for the truth. He was driven by a force only he could feel, and God help those who stood in his way. The repercussions: an aftermath inconceivable, damage irreparable and incontrovertible. He glanced at the digital readout on the VCR. 11:21 P.M. Mulder turned and looked at his phone. He reached out to take hold of it, but jerked his hand back with the sudden knock at the door. Taking a deep breath, he made his way slowly across the room. His heavy steps echoed in the silence. "Mulder, it's me." He heard Scully's soft voice, laced with worry and concern, penetrating the heavy silence. Mulder grabbed the door knob, closed his eyes, took a deep breath and opened the door. When he opened his eyes, he saw on her face what her voice had already betrayed. "Scully, what are you doing here?" He asked the question, not really caring what her answer would be. He only knew that he was glad she was there. "Are you all right, Mulder? I didn't wake you, did I?" Her voice filled the room, calming him. "Yeah. I am now. And no, you didn't wake me. Come on in." He stepped back allowing her to pass, then closed and locked the door behind them. "Is something wrong, Scully? Are you okay?" "I'm fi..." She stopped herself short of her glib reply and turned to face him. In the dim light he could see her pale face and red-rimmed eyes--eyes that glistened with unshed tears. "Umm...I'm not sure." Mulder went to her quickly, taking her by the shoulders, and bent down to get a better look at her face. Beneath his hands, her body trembled. "Come on, Scully." He ran his hands down her arms clasped her hands in his, and led her to the couch. Together they sat side by side, shoulders touching, their hands entwined. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Umm...I had a dream...at least I think it was a dream. I'm not sure...I woke up with the feeling that I needed to ... to see you." Her hands trembled beneath his as she inhaled and then slowly exhaled. "All I knew was that I needed to... to make sure you were okay." He studied her profile for a moment before speaking. "Our nexus," he said quietly. It was almost a whisper. "I've always believed we had a connection and I think you believe it too-- whether you want to admit it or not." "Mul..." He reached over and covered her lips with his fingers to keep her from continuing. "Just listen, Scully." He lifted her chin up to look at him. "I've been having this dream. And each time I have it...it changes. After I...after Roche died, the dream changed. First Caitlin was in it, then Samantha. Tonight it was...you." Mulder lowered his head, his fingers tight around her hands. His voice was low and raspy. "I felt as though the wind had been knocked out of me. I couldn't breathe. I felt as though I needed to call you. I don't know how else to explain it. I had this overwhelming need to hear your voice. I knew if I could just hear you...know that you were okay...I would be all right. I could breathe again." He felt her shiver, drew her into an embrace and softly kissed her temple. He stiffened when he felt her arms wrap around his waist, then relaxed as her head came to rest against his chest. "I want to believe, Mulder," she murmured against his chest. Mulder pulled back slightly and lifted her chin, looked into her eyes and whispered, "Believe, Scully. I do." She granted him a small smile and a slight nod of her head, as she caressed his cheek with the palm of her hand. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips and then leaned back, pulling her with him. She relaxed, resting her head and hand across his chest as he tugged the blanket from the back of the couch and covered them both. "Sweet dreams, Scully," Mulder whispered. "G'night, Mul...ler. Love you," she mumbled as sleep overtook her. Mulder smiled, tightened his hold on her waist and sighed his reply. "I love you, too." Together they slept until the dawn broke through the window blinds. * * * * * The End End Notes: This story was started in February of 2004 as just a snippet of an idea and finished November 17, 2004.